Torn: A Conversation About Who We're Losing and Why, with Jeff Strong
Source: Torn: A Conversation About Who We’re Losing and Why, with Jeff Strong Publisher: Faith Matters | Author: Faith Matters Published: May 3, 2026 | Archived: June 5, 2026
I mean, in some ways, this feels like maybe the culmination.
All right, Jeff, thank you so much for coming back. It’s always good to be here. Yeah. Yeah, always. I mean, in some ways, this feels like maybe the culmination. When did we meet you? It’s been five or six years, I think. It’s been five. Five years. Yeah, five years ago. We’ve had several conversations. Yes, we have.
You’ve done some very interesting things in the meantime. And this feels like a moment where a lot of those threads are sort of coming together.
Yeah, I think so. You’re releasing a book.
Yeah, I am. Maybe an interesting place to start. Would you mind telling us the title of the book and how that came to be? Yeah, sure.
The title of the book is called Torn, Why People We Love Are Leaving the Church and What We Can Learn for Them. Writing a book is a hard thing to do. So by the time I’m done, I’ll have revised it 20 times. In fact, the last revisions are happening right now.
And doing things like picking a title is really, really challenging. But I just felt like the word torn captures the spirit of the moment. And so I think torn is a quiet reality for many Latter-day Saints. Torn between their love for the church and somebody they love who stepped away.
uh torn between deep faith and belief and questions they’re wrestling with um you know torn between traditions that are deeply meaningful them for them that aren’t working the way they used to and so you know we did an episode last March where we talked about tension and tension is just a different way of saying torn torn
Today, we’re really excited to share a special episode with Jeff Strong on his new book, Torn: Why People We Love Are Leaving the Church and What We Can Learn From Them.
Research suggests that roughly 40% of formerly active, faithful members have stepped away from the Church in the last twenty-five years—and the pace is accelerating. Jeff Strong is asking why. Drawing on hundreds of interviews, he’s found that, again and again, disaffiliation is rooted in unmet spiritual needs, strained trust, and experiences of exclusion or spiritual starvation. Jeff’s book is unflinchingly honest—and genuinely hopeful, because if culture is part of the problem, there’s also something all of us can do to help.
In this conversation, Jeff really challenges the assumption that people leave casually. His data shows that, on average, most people wrestle for nearly a decade before stepping away. These are sincere, often private, and deeply painful journeys that deserve to be understood with care.
Jeff says that what we need are not more gatekeepers, but more gardeners. He suggests our role isn’t to monitor who’s in or out—or how “in” or “out” anyone is—but to tend the kind of soil where faith can grow: in our homes, our wards, and our relationships.
He helps us recognize when that soil has become compacted or depleted of spiritual nutrients, and offers practical, grounded ways for everyday members and leaders to cultivate something more nourishing—a more Christ-centered culture where more people can grow and flourish.
We are so excited for you to read this book and hear the conversation. You can read the introduction and first two chapters, check out the appendix, and learn more about the research on Jeff’s website, tornbyjeffstrong.com.
Write a comment